Monday Backpasses: What was my option before “laith”?

Punny

Another one of EBJT’s possible conquests clams up [Belfast Telegraph]
She’s done some nekkid modeling, too. If you’re old enough and inclined, Google loves you [NSFW]
Thomas Brolin would like a goal credited to him–19 years after the fact [When Saturday Comes]
Did Brian Ching let the news of a secret friendly against Germany slip out? [Match Fit USA]
Dissecting Euro 2012 groups by FIFA rankings [The Best 11]
As a team, you know you have failed when the FA fires all of the coaches–and the players [Soccernet]
Burnley want to expand Turf Moor. And they hope that Prince Charles will help. Maybe if they were building stables amirite?? [Sports Pro Media]
Ronaldinho needs a better password for his Hotmail account [Dirty Tackle]

Finally:
Mohamed Zidan loves . . . something [World Cup Blog]

Picture Of The Day

We always thought this guy hated Chelsea and loved Arsenal, but nothing is sacred.
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QT: Ricardo Fuller Loves Punching People

He might not score regularly, but Ricardo Fuller makes sure to punch someone at least once a year, but this time, it’s not his team captain but an inebriated civilian!

The Stoke striker celebrated a 3-0 win over Blackburn on Saturday by going out to a nightclub that night, knocking back a few drinks, and punching out a 21-year-old man around 1am on Sunday morning. His club declined to comment further while the Staffordshire Police are still investigating the incident in which the victim received “minor facial injuries” (a black eye or cut lip, I’d imagine) and expect Fuller back at the station for more questions sometime next month.

Beckham Does Something Quietly Without Media Present

FAIL

We’re shocked, honestly, that something involving the gel-haired, middle-aged midfielder could be done without a media orgy, but it’s true.

In December, the David Beckham Academy based in Carson, CA closed. And very, very quietly. Anschutz Entertainment Group (AEG) laid off the small full-time staff and followed up with a barely-circulated memo that made it around AEG and few other places (thank mercy it did escape their grip, else we still might not be aware).

While admittedly it was a tiny piece of the Beckham Empire and Brand, it’s still a notable failure considering that the 2005 launch was presided over by Beckham, AEG’s big chief and American Idol creator Simon Fuller, a guru and moneyed friend to the Beckhams.

So what went wrong? As with all things Beckham, it revolved around money.
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Nothing like senseless Blackburn-on-Blackburn Violence.

Just another day in Stoke it seems.

I don’t think many expect a Stoke/Blackburn match to be the bastion of rough and tumble fan aggression. But it seems like an unsuspecting Rover fan didn’t either, and came out on the wrong side of the event. The department of the obvious, The Sun, entered up this succinct quote:

One Rovers fan said Sunday: “Some of them had been drinking.”

Really, you don’t say. What happened?
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We’re Guessing ‘Carini’ is Portuguese for ‘Almunia’

This doesn’t require too much explanation. It’s just bad, bad goalkeeping by Fabian Carini. Anyway it comes from a match over the weekend between Atletico and Ipatinga in Brazil’s Mineiro… we think. This clearly wasn’t from the Paulista, and we’re pretty sure that Atletico Mineiro has spent most of its existence in the top flight of Brazil. We’ll get it straightened out. But for now, we’ll kind of feel a) like normal Americans who are confused by all of the different concurrent competitions in Europe and b) sad for this keeper.

The match finished 1-1.

Ligue 1 Weekend Review

Result of the week to Stade Rennais FC.

This week saw a further tightening at the top of the table as Bordeaux are only ahead by 3 points while Marseille moved into 5th with a Top-4 finish well within their sights. Although some clubs failed to register a goal, there was quite a bit of scoring overall as only one match finished in a goal-less draw.

The result of the week goes to Rennes, who stunned Bordeaux 4-2 in front of a raucous crowd.

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God Now On the Hook for the Success Of This Summer’s World Cup

The Jesus Ball

Well, it was close, but everything is now going to be okay come this summer.

The South African Bishops have issued a World Cup prayer.
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Gang Of Four: Great Own Goals

In the spirit of Mark Wilson’s superb self-destructive strike against Manchester United this weekend, I thought I’d root out four other own goals that had artistry, skill, and great finishing… except they were scored at the wrong end. These goals remind us that any goal is tough to score, even at your own end, and these defenders can console themselves with the knowledge that should they ever find themselves in a proper goal-scoring position, they are more than capable of taking advantage.

After the jump, four especially skillful examples of turning it into your own net.

[Ed. Note - I realize most of these are English, but hey, add any good ones I missed in the comments]
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Robinho’s Clearly Happy To Be Home

We’re a little hazy this morning after some Super Bowl parties, so bear with us. Tons of content to come later in the day when the hangovers have dissipated a bit.

After months of speculation, the Brazilian forward finally gained emancipation from Manchester City and headed back to the comforts of Liga do Brasil club Santos. In his first game for them this weekend, he scored the winner, and what a winner it was.

Take that, Sao Paulo!

John Terry Embarrassment Dossier

There was no better option? How about not sending it out?

Yes, we, like a lot of other sites, have had a lot to write about John Terry recently. In fact, you might even be tired of it. But the fact of the matter is, Terry is a fatally-flawed human being. A chav with money who can’t escape his past no matter how much he makes or how boorish he acts.

The fact is that since making the grade and the pay of a professional footballer, Terry has been as good as one can be on the field and as bad as he can be, and consistent about it, off of it. That is where the John Terry Embarrassment Dossier comes in. Inside, find all of the little reasons we could dig up on why England’s Brave John Terry is not the man you want on your Valentine’s Day themed e-mail, Onion Bag (this really went out last week).
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EPL Liveblog: Chelsea v. Arsenal

Such a Cuddly, Close Fixture

Couple of Programming Notes: We finally added our blogroll back at the right-hand side, along with a widget with our upcoming liveblogs schedule.

Another round of EPL fixtures, and another difficult test for Arsene Wenger and his precocious squad. We all knew that this murderer’s row of games would ultimately decide their fate — who else gets a run of back-to-back meetings with Aston Villa, Manchester United, Chelsea, and Liverpool? — but we didn’t know how much they’d struggle.

A dour draw at Villa Park and a comprehensive beating at home by Sir Alex Ferguson has heaped even more pressure on today’s game. If they lose, it’s likely too much to overcome (even with some 14-15 games remaining). If they win, well, the effects are obvious.

Wenger has smartly begun to spin the positive nature of finishing third, though hardcore Gunners fans are tired of this delicate media game. Put up or shut up time, folks. Enough talk. Enough PR. Enough excuses.

It’s no secret that Arsenal and Chelsea hate one another — just look at what they write about each other (Arsenal on CFC, and CFC on Arsenal) — so I expect some fire and fight much like Liverpool and Everton displayed yesterday.

Can Arsenal overcome the odds and get right back in the title hunt, or will this be business as usual for the boys in blue?

Lineups and commentary after the jump.
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The Finest Own Goal You Will Ever See

I’m not sure how many chuckled at this on FSR or Setanta last night, but if you missed it, here’s your chance to see Pompey defender Marc Wilson’s sumptuous volley into his own net against Manchester United yesterday.

Not only was it arguably the second own goal scored by Wilson and Pompey in the 5-0 hammering, but it was the 9th own goal scored for Manchester United this season, making “own goals” the second-highest scorer for the 2008/09 EPL champions.

Anyways, enough talk. Enjoy this crisp strike over and over and over and over again.

Check Out The Euro 2012 Qualifying Draw!

Says It All, Really

At 11am GMT, some folks met in Warsaw (home of the Euro 2012 final) to pluck some balls from some pots and sort out the qualifying groups for the tournament.

Analysis to follow tomorrow, but the groups themselves are after the jump. Prognosticate at will.
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