Unprofessional Foul


May 10, 2008

This Might Be One of the Funnier Things Ever

Fulhamerica play for their EPL (suck it, Barclay’s) life tomorrow. And the baby Jesus must love the lads because, miraculously, they control their own destiny, although they are at Pompey while Reading get to play the Washington Generals Derby County, so they are by no means a favorite to avoid the drop.

But even if the Cottagers fall, they could end up in Europe next season.


Okay, by “could” we mean we’re guessing at a couple of things without bothering to look them up because the thought of them adds just one more layer of delicious intrigue to the final week viewing of EPL football but it still doesn’t seem entirely impossible.

Follow along after the jump as we walk irresponsibly through this.

Where Enlgand the country suck as football—enjoy that summer vacation, boys—their league teams are very nice in the way they go about their business. So the EPL has managed to earn another UEFA Cup spot by topping Europe’s fair play (or is that Fair Play?) rankings.

Currently EPL Fair Play 5th placers Man City are the highest ranked team without a guaranteed spot in Europe.

The entire table can be seen here but it’s not the soap opera that is Man City that’s of interest here, or of interest to us—frankly we can’t collectively bring ourselves to care much about Citeh around these parts save maybe for their sweeping of United—its the MLS East club sitting in seventh.

So the first thing we’re too lazy to look up: Is it possible to jump .06 of a fair play point in one weekend? We could probably do the maths but that seems like a lot of work when this kind of wild baseless speculation is more fun.

But if that kind of jump is possible, Fulham could conceivably get to that last Fair Play spot on points.

Perhaps some loyal Svenites at Citeh are so upset with the way that Trashcan Sinatra has left the coach dangling, that they might be happy to pick up some gratuitous cards, harass the refs and the opponents, and just generally have a good old time dropping Fair Play points this weekend.

In that instance, assuming Everton sew up their spot, Fulham would be the highest ranked remaining Fair Play team left in the Prem.

What we also don’t know is that if there is some provision stating that a club has to maintain its top flight status to keep the spot. But still, how awesome would it be if Fulham couldn’t keep it up but managed to snake a spot in Europe next season?

Might almost taking the sting out of dropping. Okay, it won’t mitigate a full £50M sting, but still, it’s a decent parting gift.

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Unprofessional Foul