Unprofessional Foul
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January 15, 2009

What brought you here?

One of the pleasures of this website has been watching how everyone gets here. Most of you regular readers go with the direct link. That’s satisfying because bookmarks mean you are likely to return. Others come in because of links from other blogs. Most of those just hit up the one page and leave. Not ideal, but it keeps us happy to see certain stories blow up across the web. Still others pop in from social sites, such as Facebook (thanks for the continued linkage, Spinach Dip).

The most entertaining category, however, is the web search. Google is the overwhelming favorite as search engine of choice, and most of the stuff that directs to this site is pretty vanilla. Of course, Eva Roob (NSFW) is pretty popular, as well. Sometimes, though, the search is a little bit different. This post will focus on those.

The first two that caught my eye were a double search for players Issiaka Traore and Alou Traore. These searches undoubtedly found our short-lived (and unfinished) series Better Know a Traore. Part 1 is here, while Part 2 is here. Part 3 is in the ether with that FA Cup of British Rock final. Norwich would have won, just so you know.

Another search that caught my eye is how good do you have to be to get into oxford united. Not entirely sure where this directed to, though this G,B,WTF is a probable. To answer the question: not very good. You do have to register, though, or else your team will lose points.

christmas is for handjobs We agree

unprofessional prone sex Someone does not like his ladies (or men) moving during intercourse. This is where our name gets us in trouble. Or at least dissappoints those who get here.

best hitler i can be Uh, what? I think you get your kids taken away.

what happened to referee hockalee I want to know what happened to commenter hockalees? He pops in from time to time, but is more often seen in DS soccer threads. Oh, and the searcher is looking for the last name Hochuli. Get it right and you’ll find out.

where can i buy the liverpool fragrance Desperation and fear? I don’t know. Have you tried rubbing a dying ferret against your face?

unprofessional pics of vaginas Our name, again, leads to disappointment for the searcher. We only show knockers.

corner kick by pele which hit the wrongly placed goal post I hate it when the goal posts are placed incorrectly, and the blind footballers get confused. Seriously, what was this search for and how did it get here?

And my favorite all-time search, which has shown up repeatedly over the last few months:
Bulgarian watch me f**k or some variation thereof. Last February, Martin Petrov ruined Precious Roy’s fantasy week, and PR vented with this post. Since then, no lie, the above search shows up at least once a week. Bulgarians must be way into dogging.



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Unprofessional Foul





10 Comments


  1. Ibracadabra

    The “Bulgarian watch me f**k” variation is great.

    On a weekly basis (sometimes daily) we get a variation of “very tempting butts.”

    I think it’s pretty funny that someone keeps typing in “butts,” it just seems so soft core. Still, it has to be our best recurring keyword search.


  2. hockalees

    I read UP at least daily. My workload has kept me from being timely with any comments. I visit here, Soccernet and BBC for what is up on football.

    As an aside, I viewed my profile page on DS last week to dl my Arsenal icon, and for the first time I noticed that there are “Messages”. In there, I found one from Dec07 that LB sent to me mentioning starting this very blog. So to answer your message… I am very interested in this blog, it is a great idea.


  3. The Fan's Attic

    "What brought you here?"

    The T&A.

    @hockalees:

    Haha. Don't you wish you got in the ground floor? Now our stock is through the roof and we've made millions.

    /not really.


  4. Mike Georger

    I can take credit for the Hitler thing, shocking.


  5. bergkampesdios

    #1 – so long as you continue to post the NSFW Roob link, I will continue to click it. No matter how many times I’ve clicked it before.

    #2 – why must she always wear sunglasses? Does she have wee beady eyes or something?


  6. Andrew

    Hold me closer, Baby Hitler . . .


  7. Nathaniel

    Best Hitler I Can Be = Mein Kamp (poor english translation?)


  8. Nathaniel

    Kampf, you aryan retard.


  9. Brian

    I once put up a post on Run of Play satirizing political correctness in football under the title “Disabled Asian Girls Aged 5-15, Show Us the Way.”

    The Google searches coming into that page… I can’t even… I’ve seen things.


  10. MoonshineMike

    Lingering Bursitis promised me a beer.



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