Unprofessional Foul


September 15, 2009

Shoe-nanigans! Get it? Yeah, I guess it’s obvious


Forlan in a rare upright moment

Diego Forlan recently admitted he got caught in some shoe-nanigans while at Manchester United.  No, I’m not talking about about Bendtner-style shoe problems or, er, Bendtner-style shoe problems, I’m talking about choosing ones that make you look like you are on a slip n’ slide instead of playing football.  Oh, and choosing to do so after the boss of all bosses has told you to switch studs will get you shipped out.

Forlan famously could not score while at Old Trafford, so the purple-faced one tried to give him a simple remedy: play in longer studs.  You know, the kind that you see advertised as being for wet, soft ground.  Therefore, the kind made for every pitch in the EPL, save for those teams that groundshare with rugby teams.  But no, Forlan knew better and continued to play in shorter studs.

That is, he played in them until he no longer played for United at all.  Forlan recounted his end at United by saying that in a game against Chelsea he slipped on the wet, soft gorund while chasing a clear goal scoring opportunity.  Then, at the whistle, Forlan raced into the locker room so SAF wouldn’t find out that his striker had disobeyed him.  Forlan wasn’t fast enough in changing, however, and was caught, never played for Manchester United again.  Oops.

Of course, it’s not all bad.  Forlan moved on to Villareal in Spain.  In his first season in La Liga, Forlan led the league in scoring.  Further, Ferguson didn’t hold too much of a grudge either.  Forlan reports that when Villareal were to face Arsenal in the Champions League, Sir Alex was kind enough to pass along a scouting report. Take that, Arsene!

In a final revelation, Forlan outs Roy Keane was a sweetheart who tried on several occasions to get the Uruguayan goal scorer to move to Sunderland.  Forlan, of course, did not.  He was probably thinking that the wet Northeast was not a good place to play when all one wants to do is wear the short studded boots.

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