Nani clearly wants to collect unemployment

No doubt happier times for the pair

In the most ill-advised career move since Nicolas Cage agreed to star in National Treasure, Manchester United winger Nani has decided to “tell all” about working/training conditions at United, not that anyone was particularly interested.

He also savages Sir Alex a bit, which means he’ll be the first somewhat-big name making the rounds in January’s transfer window. You know, if you’re a club manager who’s interested in paying for a guy that’ll publicly stab you in the back if he’s unhappy in any way.

To the quote-giver himself, on Ferguson’s training/motivation methods: “Ferguson is a very complicated man. He’s tough. If things are all right, then they are all right. But when he thinks something is wrong, everything is screwed. He can go from complimenting you to just plain trashing you in a matter of minutes. Has it happened to me? Hell, yes! He’ll say ‘Nani, how could you miss this or this’?” He shouts at players in front of everyone. No one escapes, everybody is the same. Giggs and Neville suffer most, because they have more experience. It is ‘F**k’ here and ‘F**k’ there.”

Scandalous stuff! The manager gets unhappy when players don’t do what they’re supposed to! And no amount of yelling is enough to make me pity Gary Neville, so let’s move on.

How does Nani reflect upon his own time at Old Trafford? “People expect more from me and it’s not easy. But they are also not doing what they said they were going to. I know it would be better if I scored more goals. I can have a spectacular game but nobody guarantees me I will be starting the next match. It shatters your confidence. I did not play the important matches, against Liverpool, Manchester City or Tottenham. Not playing these games, I am a bit sad. But for now I am not considering leaving.”

Suddenly, the story becomes more mundane. Another case of an unhappy soccer player mouthing off, although as the rest of the piece rightly explains, doing it while employed at Manchester United is never the smartest move. Just ask David “Shoe Kick” Beckham, or Jaap “I wrote my feelings in a book!” Stam, or even Roy Keane, a man who can’t get on with anyone these days.

Nani shouldn’t feel too aggrieved; he’s made 13 appearances thus far in 2009/10, more than Scholes, Giggs, Anderson or Fletcher, and he knows exactly what he signed up for when joining a club known for rotations and a dearth of preferential treatment.

I think next time Nani opens his mouth, probably while on a plane to his new club in France, Turkey or Russia, he should wax lyrical on just how he’s found himself shuttled out of a good club so quickly. After all, he’s 22, and has plenty of time to learn his lesson.