Kaka Was Cack Last Night

The line between agents, advisers, hangers-on and friends is growing more blurry by the day. The one common bond is that all four are there for the players they are associated with, and there’s never a minute of the day where they couldn’t be defending their commodity and denigrating someone else at the same time.

Take Kaka, a forlorn, frustrated figure who didn’t really show much enterprise in last night’s gloriously enjoyable Champions League exit at the hands of Lyon (yep, we’re milking this a while longer). As such, he was hastily removed from the fray and spared further embarrassment after Lyon’s well-taken goal (video of it after the jump), replaced by Pellegrini in the 77th minute for seasoned goal-poacher Raul.

It’s a puzzling move based on their current form and achievements, but Raul has made a career of bailing out the Galacticos when his better-paid teammates couldn’t get the job done. With the score tied at 1-1, there’s no better scenario for the aging frontman to lace up, put up, and shut up the opposition.

Obviously, it didn’t work, but Pellegrini’s move was justified. Not so to Kaka’s adviser, Diogo Kotschko.
He took to his personal Twitter feed after the defeat, swift to slam the manager for daring remove his prized pal from the action.

Describing the Chilean boss as a “coward” to the press, he elaborated (if anyone knows Portuguese, you can follow him here) on his feed, accusing Pellegrini of “trying to take the focus off [his] own incompetence” with the substitution. If anything, he’s just trying to do whatever he can to rescue the club from an embarrassingly disjointed performance!

Kaka, predictably, toed the party line and wouldn’t dare drag his manager through the dirt, such is his squeaky-clean, God-loving image: “I did not like the situation of the game,” he said. “I was not angry about the change, but the scoreline. I was replaced by Raúl, who has a lot of experience in scoring.”

Don’t let that stop your friend Diogo, though. Once the Real fans took Kotschko to task for his comments, he pulled a Jim Rome/Steven Cohen and hid behind his right to slander: “[I] did not say anything to offend anyone. I gave my opinion at the moment and I will not erase,” and “I accept everyone’s opinion … I gave [mine] generally about something that happens in football.”

Indeed you did, Diogo. I’m sure if it was Higuain or Guti replaced, you’d have been just as quick to tweet of the injustice and incompetence. Still, it’s another layer of icing on a delicious cake of justice, and we shall all be watching the in-fighting and fallout with great interest. Heck, I might even make popcorn.

For good measure, the goal that made Cristiano weep: