WC 2010 Liveblog: Netherlands v. Slovakia

Marek Hamsik's WAG will be hoping he can score ON the pitch.

It’s the Clockwork Oranje facing off against The Repre, in a match-up of sides that have looked pretty good in their later matches.

The Dutch are heavily favored to win this match, but you could have said the same about a lackluster Italian side that went down to the Slovaks just a few days ago.

The defending World Cup champions found out that the teamsheets mean nothing if the performance on the pitch isn’t there.

Despite a large number of players on both sides carrying YCs, there have been relatively few lineup changes made. The Netherlands are happy to be able so start Arjen Robben, while the Slovaks will once again run out the coach’s boy, Vladimir Weiss (shouldn’t he be a Jr?).

Netherlands:
Starting XI: Stekelenburg – Mathijsen; van Bronckhorst; Heitinga; van der Wiel – de Jong; van Bommel; Robben; Sneijder; Kuyt – van Persie
Subs: Vorm; Boschker; Boulahrouz; Ooijer; de Zeeuw; Braafheid; Elia; Schaars; Babel; Afellay; Huntelaar; van der Vaart

Slovakia:
Starting XI: Muchia – Pekarik; Skrtel; Durica; Zabavnik – Weiss; Kucka; Stoch – Jendrisek; Hamsik; Vittek
Subs: Pernis; Kuciak; Cech; Kozak; Sestak; Sapara; Holosko; Jakubko; Kopunek; Salata; Petras; Strba (out on a RC)

Alberto Undiano (ESPANA) will be running the middle at Durban Stadium. I expect he will make a ludicrous call/non-call at some point, in keeping with the poor officiating throughout this World Cup.

00:00 – Is Dirk Kuyt the most unattractive player at the World Cup?

00:00 – Do the Slovaks have the worst hair of any team still in the World Cup?

00:01 – AND WE’RE OFF!

00:30 – A long throw up the left comes to Weiss, who lays it back off to Hamsik. He is forced to play the ball all the way back to Skrtel, who holds form by sending a terrible ball over the top. On the return down the pitch Robben is dispossessed easily, and that’s not a good sign. Weiss takes the ball and finds Jendrisek, who puts a shot over the crossbar.

02:30 – A long ball to Kuyt from Heitinga is put out for a throw-in by the Slovaks. In an attempted clearance, van Bronckhorts wins a deeper throw that almost finds Robben in the box. The Slovaks get a short clearance that van Bommel works to Sneijder, but Kucka clears it.

04:10 – Robben finds Sneijder at the top of the box with some space after some good passing through the midfield, but his shot is over the crossbar. Stupid Jabulani.

04:50 – James T cries as Ally McCoist insists that both sides are playing a 4-1-2-1-2.

05:10 – A shot from Hamsik goes wide, after which the Dutch come down to the other end of the pitch for Kuyt to put a shot of his own wide.

06:20 – First foul of the match as Hamsik takes down van Bommel from behind. And it’s a good call! Huzzah for competent officiating.

06:50 – A cross deep into the box from Kuyt finds van Persie in between defenders, but it’s deflected out for a corner. That ball from Robben is headed clear for a throw-in, and the Dutch are forced to reset.

08:20 – A ball into the middle from Stoch, who has been brilliant, is too close to Stekelenburg for an easy take.

09:20 – OH SNAP! The commentators just called de Jong and van Bronckhorst “the soft part of the defense”.

10:00 – Van Persie gets the ball in space in the middle, and he lays off a perfect touch for Sneijder, who puts the ball into the feet of Muchia. The Slovak netminder scuffs the first save, but is able to cover it on his second try.

11:30 – The Dutch have already played a surprising number of long balls, some of which have found them offsides, while others have run too long for the wingers. See what happens when you abandon total football?!?!

12:20 – Zabavnik jumps into and over de Jong for a foul, but Kuyt’s free-kick is intercepted.

13:10 – BAH! Weak call as van Bronckhorst stands behind Zabavnik and the latter goes down. The referee has to blow his whistle again as Gio cheekily moves the ball, but he escapes a booking. Off the free-kick the Slovaks get the ball in space on the right side, but the shot to the far post goes well wide.

15:20 – Yet another long ball from the Dutch, and Ally McCoist says that they are not exhibiting urgency. Scintillating analysis.

16:00 – Durica holds Mathijsen’s arm, and then pushes him in the back for a free-kick. That ball from van Bommel is so poor that I can’t even describe it.

17:10 – GOAL! Netherlands 1-0 Slovakia. A ball over the top actually comes to fruition, as Robben is played deep down the right side and 2 defenders allow him to get there easily. One move to his left side and he puts his shot through the legs of Durica for the opener.

20:20 – Slovakia build out of the back on a deep throw-in, working the ball through Hamsik and Skrtel. Stoch turns the ball over and the Dutch are able to break, but Sneijder’s pass for Robben is too far and goes over the touchline.

21:50 – Weiss dribbles confidently down the left, but it’s perhaps a bit much as he takes the ball into traffic and is dispossessed by van der Wiel. The Dutch are unable to do anything on a counter, and Slovakia come back down the pitch only to see a cross in the box fall easily to Stekelenburg on the bounce.

23:30 – Durica and Hamsik are perhaps the s**ttiest hair combination in the World Cup.

24:10 – The Dutch attack down the left, moving the ball through Kuyt, but pull it back and switch the field to Robben on the right. This type of passing is much closer to what is expected of La Naranja Mechanica, and they are dominating possession now. Of course, as I type that they turn it over.

25:40 – A corner from Sneijder is put too close to Muchia, who punches it clear to midfield. The Dutch maintain possession, but van Bommel is only able to earn a throw-in after rocketing it into a Slovak defender. Off that ball they win a corner, which Robben sends long to the far post only to see Sneijder called for a foul as he takes down Zabavnik in the box.

29:00 – Jendrisek and Vittek attempt a 1-2, but the return ball from the latter is poor and goes over the touchline.

29:40 – Van Bommel barges into Vittek, who stays down a bit longer than was necessary. The free-kick from Stoch is flicked out on defense (dangerously, as it came off at a strange angle), and Durica puts the ball back in on a throw-in.

30:50 – YELLOW CARD FOR ROBBEN! I have no problem with that call. Despite how close Robben was, his arm was fully extended from his body and it stopped the pass from going through. The free-kick from Stoch eventually comes out to Jendrisek, who puts his shot well over the crossbar (and possibly wide).

33:10 – Jendrisek makes an excellent turn and gets a hand to the face from van Bronckhorst for his trouble. The free-kick from Hamsik is played short and winds up on the right side, where a ball in from Skrtel is played out by Heitinga. Zabavnik then misses the ball entirely and kicks at Robben.

34:50 – The wind appears to have torn up the assistant referee’s flag, and there is an exchange made with the fourth official. Strange goings-on.

37:20 – The Dutch get into a bit of trouble down the left side and are forced to play it out for a throw-in. That ball comes into Jendrisek, but he is unable to break through after racing into the box, and it gets played off him for a goal-kick.

38:30 – Another long ball for van Persie runs a little bit too long, but Durica looked a little gimpy as he corralled it. Possibly something to watch there.

39:10 – YELLOW CARD FOR KUCKA! He loses control and as de Jong goes to put the ball out of bounds the Slovak midfielder comes in with a late, studs-up tackle. No contact was made, but the referee thinks it was unsportsmanlike.

40:10 – Van Persie races into the defense with almost no help from his teammates, and takes a shot in between several defenders that is easily stopped by Muchia.

40:40 – The Slovaks come back down the pitch and Vittek takes a shot that is deflected for a corner. It’s played short between Weiss and Stoch, who switches fields cleverly. Durica receives the ball in the middle, but after a pass to Vittek the ball is sent long over the touchline.

42:50 – “Van Persie had made the gallop.” Shouldn’t that be van Nistelrooy doing the galloping?

43:20 – Van Bommel gets loose on the right, and as he moves to the endline he sends in a ball for van Persie that the Arsenal striker puts wide.

44:25 – Hamsik wins a deep throw-in, and after van der Wiel fails with a short clearance there is a foul called for…SHIT, I DON’T KNOW. Bad hair on Hamsik?

HALF-TIME – NETHERLANDS 1-0 SLOVAKIA. Other than some brief forays, the Slovaks have looked completely outclassed. Fortunately for them, the Dutch aren’t really playing total football, instead choosing to go Route 1 far too often.

DEAR DEREK RAE: Considering the relationship of Arikaners to the Dutch, you may want to stop referring to the Netherlands team as “The Dutch Masters.” I’m just sayin’.

45:00 – AND WE’RE OFF AGAIN!

45:40 – An excellent backheel flick from Weiss puts the ball into space, but no one is running onto it and he is unable to catch up to it himself.

46:40 – Vittek dribbles at the top of the box and gets a chip into the area, but both Slovakian attackers just stopped on the 18-yard line, perhaps thinking that they were offside. A little strange.

48:20 – Some good work from Weiss and Vittek sees the former get it back at the top of the box. The Dutch are able to make a short clearance, and the Slovaks reset all the way back to their own defense.

49:40 – Robben is denied a brace as his shot from the top of the box is barely pushed wide by Muchia. How do you continually let Robben dribble to his left like that? The corner is cleared, but the Dutch regain possession. Robben plays a great ball into the middle for Mathijsen, but Muchia makes a brilliant save on the shot from close range.

52:00 – Excellent work down the left from von Bronckhorst gets to Sneijder, who earns that free-kick as Kucka barged into him. A pretty weak call, as it looked innocuous, but the ball into the box is easily taken by Muchia so there is no harm done.

53:40 – Van Bommel gets a boot into Kucka for a free-kick, but the Slovaks waste it when Zabavnik is awarded a handball. The Dutch are content to play it back through the defense, and begin to build up the left side with Kuyt. Van Persie does well to dribble into the defense, but he tries to beat one too many defenders and is dispossessed. He also managed to step on Zabavnik without the referee noticing anything. The Slovak gets up and attempts to walk it off, and goes down again immediately.

57:10 – A ball down the right from Sneijder to Robben is well-taken, but the return pass is off Robben’s right foot and goes astray. That, folks, is why you force Robben off his left foot.

58:10 – A free-kick in a dangerous position is stood over by Robben and van Persie, with the latter taking it and forcing another excellent save from Muchia. The Slovakian netminder got off an excellent punch, even with Kuyt barging into him late.

59:55 – A silly foul is called on Sneijder at midfield when it looked like Kucka just tripped over him. Another poor referee decision, and the Slovaks move well on the break. Stoch gets the ball on the left and is dispossessed as he tries to dribble between two defenders. He quite possibly should have gotten a free-kick there.

61:40 – Weiss does some some good work down the right side, but it’s again a case of trying to beat one too many defenders. After the turnover, he predictably commits a foul, and the Dutch reset. They turn the ball over almost immediately, and Kucka unleashes a shot from 40 yards that Stekelenburg pushes wide. That’s a missed call, as the Dutch are awarded a goal-kick.

63:50 – Jendrisek and van Bommel get tangled up, and the Slovaks are given a free-kick that is poorly taken by Stoch. The Dutch break through Robben, whose pass is let run by van Persie all the way to Sneijder, who sees his shot deflected.

66:00 – A great ball from Skrtel finds Hamsik, who moves to the left. The ball wins up with Stoch, who dribbles into the middle and unleashes a shot with venom that is very well-saved by Stekelenburg. On the corner, the ball comes to Vittek alone in the box. He makes an excellent turn, but is turned away by an even better save from Stekelenburg. Some beautiful work from the Dutch netminder in that sequence.

68:50 – Skrtel fouls van Persie from behind on a throw-in, but it’s yet another weak call. Skrtel will most likely have him assassinated. The ball from Sneijder comes into the middle, but is headed well over the crossbar by Kuyt.

70:00 – Netherlands substitution: Robben OFF, Elia ON. Slovakia substitution: Jendrisek OFF, Kopunek ON.

71:10 – YELLOW CARD FOR KOPUNEK! A throw-in for Slovakia is cleared up the line by van der Wiel, and the 2 substitutes combine as Kopunek comes in late with a bad tackle on Elia. Fastest World Cup booking ever?

72:40 – Van Persie finds Kuyt out on the left, and he dribbles into the middle to unleash a difficult shot that is well-saved by Muchia. The corner from Sneijder is cleared all the way back to the Dutch defense.

74:30 – A poor ball over the top from Weiss runs far too long for Vittek. Terrible stuff from the coach’s son.

75:10 – Kuyt dribbles into space before finding Elia deep on the left, but his cross to the far post goes wanting as no one is there to get on the end of it.

76:20 – Kuyt’s workrate is show yet again, as he “races” down the right side while holding off a Slovakian defender. He wins a throw-in, but that ball is wasted as it gets forced back to the defense. Quite a bit of negative football from the Dutch today. DISAPPROVE.

77:50 – Kucka receives the ball at the top of the box, and his shot is blocked. It falls to Vittek, who is held onside by van der Wiel, but he puts his shot over the crossbar.

78:50 – Netherlands substitution: Van Persie OFF, Huntelaar ON. Robin looks very unhappy.

80:00 – Huntelaar commits a foul immediately, taking down a Slovakian defender in the box. Yet another weak call, as there was barely any contact.

80:50 – Skrtel commits a “foul”, earning the Dutch a free-kick that Sneijder takes too quickly for the referee’s liking. When it eventually comes, it is wasted as it drifts into a pack of Slovakian defenders.

82:50 – GOAL! Netherlands 2-0 Slovakia. The whistle comes yet again on Skrtel for a big high boot. A legitimate call this time, but as he is arguing the Dutch play the free-kick quickly. It finds Kuyt, who touches it just past an onrushing Muchia (who should have stayed on his line) and then centers it for Sneijder to finish into the empty net.

84:10 – YELLOW CARD FOR SKRTEL! The Slovakian defender earns his booking for barking at the referee at the goal.

85:00 – Kuyt breaks down the right, and his ball to the far post falls for Elia, who puts a low shot directly at Muchia (who almost let it slip between his legs).

86:20 – Slovakia substitution: Hamsik OFF, Sapara ON; Zabavnik OFF, Jakubko ON.

87:50 – Kuyt finds van der Wiel down the right side, who plays it back to Kuyt. The cross is high and wide, and Muchia watches it fly into Row Z. How embarrassing for Dirk Kuyt.

88:45 – Clearly upset by my last comment, Kuyt comes down the right side again, this time crossing low into the middle only to see Muchia take it well.

90:00 – Huntelaar goes down clutching his face after he is called for a foul on Skrtel. That’s absolutely terrible, and he should be ashamed of himself for that playacting.

91:30 – Netherlands substitution: Sneijder OFF, IBRAHIM AFFELAY ON! (Seriously, I love that kid).

91:55 – Affelay immediately takes a shot on goal that is deflected out, but the Slovaks are wrongly awarded the goal-kick.

92:55 – YELLOW CARD FOR STEKELENBURG. GOAL! Netherlands 2-1 Slovakia! Absolute madness breaks out in the box as a shot falls to Jakubko, who then beats his defender and is taken down in the box by the Dutch netminder. Vittek steps up to take the PK, and he puts it home, after which the referee immediately blows his whistle for the end of the match.

FULL-TIME – NETHERLANDS 2-1 SLOVAKIA. The Dutch dominated this match for large stretches of time, and Slovakia never looked like getting back into it once they went down 1-0. Despite that, the Netherlands weren’t that impressive, and will need a much better effort in the quarterfinals, particularly if they play Brazil.