"Move along. Nothing to see here."
I hear that such recaps are everywhere these days, but let’s try to do them in our own unique way and have some fun, eh?
We waited months for this league to come back and humor us like an old friend at the bar, except, I can’t help but feel like that friend changed in some way.
Maybe they’re as entertaining as ever, except this season they’re ducking out at last call and stiffing us with the bill. Or maybe we are just too drunk to properly recognize that it’s the same friend as always, and only our perception that’s altered.
One thing’s for certain: we have plenty to talk about.
Something About Underestimating Villa at our Peril?
We laughed at Keith on Thursday night when he spoke of Aston Villa’s relative calm in the face of chaos. How foolish we were, thinking that the Villans might be due for a fall. Y’know, because they lost their manager just five days before the season opener at West Ham, but oh, what a gift that first game would turn out to be.
West Ham were abject, allowing caretaker manager Kevin MacDonald to get his lads giddy’d up en route to a far-too-comfortable 3-0 win. James Milner was transcendent—the tabloids called it a “super send-off” for the talented midfielder, whose transfer was confirmed this morning—and youngsters like Marc Albrighton impressed along the way.
It’s still too early to suggest that this is a sign that they are built for a sustained season-long challenge, but it definitely feels like that New Manager Effect coming back into play, and right when we thought the likes of Iain Dowie and Diego Maradona had killed it…
Everton's Passing up top (blue = complete; red = incomplete), with Blackburn's below
Big Fat Sam = Big Fat Genius
How do you engineer a victory against a strong Everton team by ceding the ball, scoring early off an uncharacteristic Tim Howard blunder, and then proceeding to complete less passes than the visitors failed to complete?
(It’s true; Rovers made 63 completed passes in 90 minutes, compared to Everton’s tally of 71 passes that went astray)
There has to be some juju afoot, or just some strong work. Maybe he watched Mourinho’s masterful job against Barcelona, in which the Blaugrana were allowed to tippy-tap it around without really going anywhere.
Whatever it is, Allardyce must be given some credit for having his Rovers alert and awake to kick off the year. In 2009-10, Blackburn took 1 point from their first 3 games and struggled, but we fancy the Lancastrians to stick a little higher in the table this year.
Robberies and resolute defending like the kind we saw Saturday can make that a reality.
Everyone’s Got Green-itis
How many keepers failed this weekend? Chris Kirkland’s stupid hat wasn’t as amusing as his “effort” against Blackpool. Pepe Reina gave away two points after Manuel Almunia tried his hardest to give away all three earlier in the game.
Scott Carson, best known for being a debutant in Steve McClaren’s “Wally With a Brolly” game for England, looked even worse against a Chelsea onslaught he was unable/unwilling to stop. And of course, Robert Green continued his rich vein of form with another hilarious effort against Aston Villa.
Being a ‘keeper is the ultimate confidence game in soccer. Until all these supposedly competent shotstoppers prove that they can actually stop shots, we’ll prepare for more circus-like scorelines in the coming weeks.
Roberto Mancini Needs To Solve That Thing
I’m unusually mean toward Manchester City at the moment, I realize. Maybe it’s some jealousy on the fact that they can spend money like a rich nerd at a strip club, or maybe it’s the fact that their folksy, good-natured history is being overwritten with that same-old, same-old ruthlessness that’s changed all clubs with cash over the past decade. Shame for them is they don’t even have some cutesy-sounding slogan like mes que un club to fall back on!
Point is, with all that money and all those global brands in the 25-man squad, they should be able to go to a team like Tottenham Hotspur and win. No offense to Spurs, who’ve built a strong team at a fraction of the price, but City are trying their hardest to prove that they’re the 2004 New York Yankees instead of that feel-good 2001 version. David Silva was anonymous. Carlos Tevez was, as always, the little engine that could, but Yaya and Kola were atrocious, bemused by Lennon’s fresh haircut fade and willingly pantsed on a number of occasions.
Meanwhile, were it not for Joe Hart, the guy they didn’t seem to want last season (except when everyone else was hurt), they’d be staring down the barrel of self-doubt and a 3- or 4-spot in the “Goals Allowed” column.
This team will pull it together in due course, but the distractions will be there all season. Unlike Bellamy, they can’t all just be offloaded casually to lower-league teams. When players don’t play, they’ll sulk. When expensive guys flop, they’ll be hounded by a demanding fanbase. When the team doesn’t win, it’ll be Mancini to fall on the sword first.
And yet, Roberto is too busy buying yet more guys he’ll struggle to rotate. There are more pressing issues, surely, like squeezing 25 into 11. At the moment, it just doesn’t go.
Where In The World Is Wayne Rooney?
When should we worry about Master Wayne? Is it time yet? Scoreless since March 30 in any competition, and dogged by a bad summer and bad attitude that has left him forlorn, the Eeyore in an Aon shirt. United didn’t really need him against a wan, limp Magpies side, but the time will come when the stakes are high and all Green, Gold, and Red Devil eyes turn to him for a goal, a spark, a moment of magic. Will it be readily available?
We think it’ll just take one goal to calm the nerves and all will be fine. He almost had it Monday, shaping up to shoot only to watch it bobble up for Darren Fletcher to tally instead. Fulham are up next, coming to Old Trafford where Roo managed a brace last season in the corresponding fixture.
Until then, his well runs dry. And we non-United fans chuckle.
Oh, and I’d say we learned something about Liverpool and Arsenal, but we didn’t, really. The Gunners look as staid as ever despite playing with a man advantage, while LFC have shed some of their major problems this summer but still suffer the bad luck at inopportune times. Plus, I figure I’ll write enough about those sides in the coming weeks and months.
Whoa. Yaya Toure was atrocious? 68/70 passes completed is atrocious? Also, I’m no Kolo Toure fan, but the general consensus among the City fans I’ve read is that he had one his better games in a long long time. Perhaps that’s cause the bar has been set so low, but still he made some impressive tackles.
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“No offense to Spurs, who’ve built a strong team at a fraction of the price”
That’s really what it boils down to for me, Spurs are a strong team, City are a collection of players right now. However, isn’t that to be expected? Wouldn’t it have been more shocking if Silva and Tevez had linked up well on Saturday than if they hadn’t? They’ve trained together for barely a week, while Spurs put out a side that was largely very familiar with each other.
Add in the fact the City were on the ugly end of 3-0 stomping at the Lane last season, and this was a dramatic improvement.
Scott MacDonald
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Cmon, JT.
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And as abject as the Spammers looked, Villa took the game to them in a way that they didn’t in the corresponding fixture last year. Now’s a perfect time to talk TACTICS!
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Previously, O’Neill would play Stiliyan Petrov as a deep-lying holding midfielder, with Milner asked to do as Milner does, and run box-to-box, supporting Petrov in defensive responsibilities while also linking play up to the wings and strikers. That system worked well against teams that were looking to attack, but for home fixtures against lower-half sides that parked the bus, stifled Villa’s creativity, and lead to our dreadful home form last year.
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In Kevin MacDonald’s setup, Petrov and Milner were freed to rotate responsibilities- as evidenced by Petrov’s late run into the box for the second goal- while Ashley Young provided the vital link from the middle of the park to its advanced areas. As a result, Avram Grant’s initial 4-5-1 system — ideal for scraping a draw against an O’Neill side — was stretched by a Villa side using the entire width of the park, not just the little alleys on the touchline.
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We’ve obviously yet to see how MacDonald will approach away fixtures, and it is only one match. But the main stumbling block for Villa – its home form, and inability to break “lesser” sides down at VP – looks to have been addressed from a tactical standpoint if not yet a factual one.
F**k! I always get his name wrong!
@Ryan
Know who else completed a lot of passes? Everton. Doesn’t mean I thought he had a good game. Lennon got past him on the left a few times when he was covering, and his positioning just seemed all off on D. He didn’t block passing lanes or really trouble his markers much.
Fair point about the “team” thing, but that excuse can only last so long. This isn’t a good way to build a team, but that’s only been proven out time and time again. There’s no-one in that squad who I reckon is going to do the heavy lifting and be selfless for the cause. Except for Tevez.
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And I recognize I’m being harsh on City right now. Just not liking them at all right now. Sorry.
@JT: Well, if they play him, they just brought in a selfless player. Milner between Toure and De Jong might give them the type of back-tracking central midfielder they’re looking for. Though, I wouldn’t be surprised if after all of this The Scarf or his October successor managed to Robbie Keane the Milner transfer. I as a supporter will gladly welcome back James for 12 million and Moustapha Salifou.
Joe Hart is my player of the week (despite Drogba’s effortless hat trick). Without him, City gets trounced, and he shone especially bright against the goalkeeping from the rest of the league. He made some truly spectacular saves and earned the point for his side.
@tiramisu
Agreed; he was transcendent.
@JT: Everton completed 82% of their passes, Yaya 98%. Not a great comparison in my opinion. His job is to link play up to the front men, but unfortunately the front men he was linking up to were SWP, a tired, likely unfit David Silva, and Tevez in a bit of a weird role.
No need to apologize for criticizing City, a lot of it is warranted, just think there are much much more deserving targets than Yaya Toure. Micah Richards for instance, who spent most of the game watching Gareth Bale run by him.
1. I slagged off Villa last week and they showed me. Outclassed WH by a large margin. I contend they’re going to have a difficult fall still.
2. Wait…we’re congratulating Fat Sam for playing Fat Sam’s game? Score a fluke goal and then put all 10 outfielders behind the ball…awesome, fat boy! I hate him soooo much. And stop chomping on gum all the time. Only whores do that
3. The main positive I took out of that Lpool-Arsenal game is that Kos is a stud and my new favorite. I figured Cole broke his leg and he was done; to pick himself up was huge, but beating Torres to that 50-50 ball when he would’ve been clear on was the moment for me. Kid might have a future – plus, with Chamakh we didn’t lose our quota of mulleted players when Eduardo left, so that’s good too.
4. Mancini is kind of damned if you do, damned if you don’t. I don’t envy having to make his team selection every game either
5. Hats off to Blackpool.
Going to agree with the first comment. That was about as good as Kolo Toure has looked in a long time.
@Ryan
Put it this way; I don’t think he lived up to any kind of expectation. Not sure he was the right purchase, even.
I don’t envy having to make his team selection every game either.
Bullsh*t. I’m playing Balotelli and Adebayor up top every week and terrorizing EPL defenses. I’ll use Tevez for the cups and as a 70th minute sub when his workrate will really punish tired defenders.
I learned that Fox Soccer Channel’s website ripped off this article premise and used s**tty Bleacher Report writers to do it.
@PR
Sounds nice enough. Bet it wouldn’t work.
@Georger
FSC’s really struggling in that dept.
@Ryan – Gareth Bale did look pretty impressive (even though he flubbed the shot with the game on his foot), though maybe you have a point about Micah Richards making him look that way.
Another thing we learned this week – while there are lots of reasons to dislike Joey Barton, that ‘stache ain’t one of ‘em.
@JT: Sounds nice enough. Bet it wouldn’t work.
But wouldn’t it be nice just to have the opportunity to try.
@JT: Well, he’s no Joe Cole, that’s for sure.
Sorry, that was uncalled for.
Ha, Ryan! It’s ok. I give your team plenty of s**t, not all of it necessarily merited. That said, we didn’t pay 23m for Cole, nor did we give him 200k a week…
Why Ade over Tevez when the former is a system guy and Mancini wouldn’t know a good system if he got bludgeoned to death with a Sega Genesis?
Adebayor certainly doesn’t merit a spot on that team. That said, funny how he actually made a difference once he came on. This team is so unpredictable! And nice to use Silva as a withdrawn striker instead of as a winger, which is what he does all the time.
Ade holds up the ball pretty well AND can score. Think with Milner and Balotelli Citeh will now actually have people that can come into the play instead of 5 defensive mids who can’t support a lone Tevez trying to run around by himself.
Joe Cole: Messiah of Scouse!
Did find it interesting how Mancini started 3 DMs and stacked them left across midfield.
@JT: And we still created our chances. Aside from the finishing department, we’s lookin’ good.
@ JT: Yes, I liked that formation. The Scarf’s heavy use of clogging his midfield w/defensive-minded players that allowed Tevez to be isolated and alone in the box is the strategy they should employ often.
@PR – what happens when things go poorly and you have two strikers in Ade and Balotelli who are simultaneously throwing a temper tantrum?
I don’t know how you’re not playing Tevez every game. He’s one of the few who will sacrifice for the cause and play 100% every minute of the game – Milner, maybe Barry if either are guaranteed starters even. Conversely, you could bring on Ade or Balotelli at 70 minutes and frighten tired defenses with their size, pace and power.
And what the h is david silva going to be doing? swapping ipods with SWP?
Th3 3 DMs thing is worrying, but again, it’s top 4 side away from home. If he puts 3 of them out there again on Monday, it’ll be an issue.
In other bad news, rumors that new left back Kolarov could be out 3 months.
@Ryan: Say that again, please? The part after “but again” and before “away from home.”
Enjoy it while it lasts puppy.
Oh, don’t worry, I will. :)
@Ryan
Initially, I thought he learned that 3 DMs trick from SAF, who used it at WHL when those two teams met last season. Stacked Scholes, Park, and Fletcher in the middle with Giggs as the outlet wide left, and it worked.
Plus, he’s probably trying to integrate slowly. What shape do you think would work best for Citeh? 4-2-3-1?
@JT: A pentagram.
@ JT: a 3-1-3-3 so everyone can party.
@JT: I’m a huge fan of the 4-2-3-1, so yeah I think that would be great. Even some variation of the 4-4-2 type thing that he played last year would be okay.
Tevez? Giving himself for the cause? [spits milk and cookies out]. Tevez who couldn’t be bothered to learn English and f**ked off across town because Fergie sat him at times during a season when his goals/shots ratio dropped 50% over the prior year?
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If City is relying on Tevez as a mature, grounded individual, they’re truly f**ked. Tevez is simply the least dickish of the crew of me-first strikers assembled.
@WEdel – Ade could learn a thing or two about diplomacy from ‘los, as sad as that is
@whiz: You know I liked Tevez quite a bit for his decision to not get the cosmetic surgery. He said something along the lines of “it’s who I am.” But I think he (and many others) are attention whores – to wit, his motivation was OT chanting, “Fergie sign him up.” I don’t get the sense – due to his comments in the divorce – that he ran around because it created space, or what not. He did because he liked to hear his name, something he referred to often in negotiations.
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United fans typically subscribe to the theory that leaving United is a step down as many former Reds have said). I don’t mind that Tevez went looking for greener pastures. I do mind where he chose – simply because his logic was poor, not because it’s City. If you are a striker looking for playing time, do you go to a club that collects strikers like Panini stickers?
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He may end up being a leader, but past performance makes me think he’ll spit the dummy at some point.
Wedel: It worked out for him though didn’t it? Yes, he went to a team with a good number of strikers, but he played in pretty much every game he was fit to play in.
btw, Ryan: Is Yaya’s 98% completion percentage worthy of 200,000 effing quid a week? Because that’s close to the sum total of Blackpool’s wage bill, and they at least finished their chances.
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Just sayin’
@Ryan: It certainly did. I think he’s a very, very good player. I just think he’s inconsistent and a bit more selfish than folks think when they see him run around. He certainly fooled certain sections of OT.
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As you state, he has made himself a “must pick” and 100% fair play to him for doing so in a crowded situation. I would have liked to think if he showed that dedication at United he would have retained his spot and displaced Berbatov.
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Where I foresee a potential problem is if someone else shoehorns themselves into the discussion (whether through merit or purchase price) does Tevez continues to perform or does he sulk?
What did we learn? Chelsea can score by the yachtload against West Brom, Liverpool and Arsenal might not be that good, and Blackpool is going to Europe next year.
@Keith: Too early to say I think, but it’s not Yaya’s job to finish chances. Say SWP puts his chance away after Yaya’s fantastic chipped through ball, and Tevez slots his home as well instead of hesitating like he did. Then we’re talking about 2-0 and Yaya having two nice assists. He can’t be held accountable for his teammates failures is all I’m saying.
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@Wedel: Yeah, I can’t really make much argument with you there. His most recent talking point seems to be about how much he hates it in England, and just wants to retire to go back to Argentina. He’ll be good for at least one dustup with Mancini this year I reckon. But so long as he keeps banging them in, I don’t know if I’ll complain too much.
@WSR: Is that a radar- and paparazzi-jamming yachtload or just a regular run-of-the-mill yacht like you or I might have?
Oh, non-City thing I learned: Newcastle are atrocious going forward, and I think that- even more than shoddy defending- will be their downfall.
@Ryan
Co-sign there. Andy Carroll and Peter Lovenkrands aren’t going to get it done in the EPL. Did Chris Hughton not look at Arsenal’s very own Danish striker and figure that out?
Radar- and paparazzi-jamming with 2 helicopter pads and a Bond villainesque submarine, Wedel.
Ha, on my “It could’ve been 2-0 to City point”, I guess I should also say it could have been 0-6 in favor of Spurs by that point as well. So there’s that.
@JT: If Lovenkrands upgrades(?!) to pink boots though, he’s world class, right?
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@Ryan: If he keeps banging them in, there’s absolutely no reason to question a thing. To be fair to you, I don’t think you raised Tevez as a role model, but cheers to you for defending your boy.
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@WSR: Yeah, I don’t have any of that stuff.
@Ryan, JT: I’m actually surprised, given that he had scored a few for Newcastle on loan last year, that Hughton didn’t look to sign Harewood on a free. Oh well, his loss is apparently Ian Holloway’s (and, thus, the game of football’s) gain.
@Ryan: And that’s fine, but weren’t City getting comparable quality of passing from Stephen Ireland and Gareth Barry, who don’t combine to make Toure’s wage? Bed, lie and all that. . .
On a US-centric note, I learned that Clint Dempsey is never allowed to start when a new manager comes in because he doesn’t have a classically defined position.
You know, just thinking about the players Citeh have brought in now and there are many first team England players on the squad: Hart, Richards (sometimes), Barry, Milner, A. Johnson, and SWP(hope not). Along with Bridge, The Scarf & The Sheik are collecting all the Three Lions. Citeh for Euro 2012?
I thought Yaya played great.
@OM: Quiet you. City are ruining football and everyone knows it. Read the papers like a good lad.