Liveblog: Manchester City v. Liverpool

At least someone will wear this badge.

Yet another game where I root for the meteor. But as we get ready for this one, Javier Mascherano has given us some pregame fodder…

The Argie has, if you believe reports, essentially gone on strike by refusing to play for Liverpool at Eastlands tonight. I’ll leave alone the jokes about why it makes him the smartest man on the night.

Apparently, Javier is going all-in with his desire to move to Barthelona, but the bid they’ve made isn’t close to the asking price. Barca are reported to have already agreed to personal terms with the player, but the teams are still haggling.

The bid, according to the Guardian, is 15 million euros plus Alexander Hleb and Martin Caceres thrown in for Mascherano. The asking price from Liverpool is closer to 30 million euros.

I’m not even going to get into the fact that I hate teams like Barca “agreeing to terms” with the player before a transfer is done. Mostly because United have done it, too, I’m sure. But Javier needs to stop being all Scotty Pippen about it and play if he’s asked. He’ll get to leave soon enough…

With that, I’ll be back in a bit with the actual lineups and the game itself, CAMON METEOR!

PREGAME: Hey Ryan… the lineups are my job. If I’m gonna hang out for two hours watching this game, don’t take away my stuff.

PREGAME: Man City: Hart, Richards, Toure, Kompany, Lescott, De Jong, Toure Yaya, Barry, Milner, Adam Johnson, Tevez. Subs: Given, Zabaleta, Wright-Phillips, Adebayor, Silva, Vieira, Jo.
Liverpool: Reina, Johnson, Skrtel, Carragher, Agger, Jovanovic, Gerrard, Lucas, Kuyt, Torres, Ngog. Subs: Jones, Aurelio, Pacheco, Kyrgiakos, Maxi, Babel, Poulsen.
Referee: Phil Dowd (Staffordshire)

PREGAME: I can’t stand Skip Bayless. Have I mentioned that before? And Dana Jacobsen was hotter when she was the sports anchor at News10 in Sacramento.

PREGAME: Jolean Lescott gets some run. That’s a bit shocking. I guess they need to justify the waste of 29 million pounds.

PREGAME: The best part of a 2:55 start for football means less Skip Bayless. But now we get BRETOS. NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! (yes, I will do that every time)

PREGAME: @Ryan: I do the job up to the salary I get paid. Yes, I know he played Thursday. I was shocked then, too, because he’s been utter crap.

PREGAME: @Wedel: No way do I want a 0-0 draw. I was a 7-7 draw with six red cards and two ACL blowouts. Otherwise, this is a waste of my time.

PREGAME: Heh. Bretos and Mustoe comment that Citeh are forced to play Lescott like he’s Mikael Silvestre. Nice.

HERE WE GO!!!

1st minute: Alan Parry pointing out the problems with last season for these teams. Heh. And Torres is called for his first offside of the night.

2nd minute: James Milner gets his first touch of the night. And it goes nowhere.

3rd minute: Liverpool look the more comfortable to start, although Lucas throws out a bad cross. Mascherano would have done better.

4th minute: Phil Dowd FTW! He books Skrtl.

5th minute: It’s clear Adam Johnson is going to run rampant against the left side of the Liverpool defense.

7th minute: How bad was Lescott’s first touch?! Very bad. Here, let me pass straight to the other team…

8th minute: Hmm, why does Citeh look like a team that hasn’t come together?

9th minute: OK, I give Milner credit. He’s come right in and is doing well with Tevez. And that shot from Adam Johnson was quite close. The Sheikh approves. This is better from Citeh.

10th minute: Alan Parry takes a couple of swipes at Phil Dowd. Nicely done calling him “not among the elite” or EPL refs. Ummm, who’s the elite?

11th minute: The Johnson shot actually was close. About 2 feet wide. And @Tno: There’s a chance I’m moving to San Diego in the near future.

13th minute: GOOOOOOOOALLL!!!! Citeh 1-0 Pool. That was top class. Yaya Toure, Adam Johnson, great little ball through to Milner, who pulls it back to a wide-open Gareth Barry. Well done to them (and I get points from Milner)

15th minute: Tevez almost has a chance for the second on a great diagonal run. Carragher could have been called for pulling the bulldog Argie in the box, but he didn’t dive.

16th minute: Gerrard puts in a good cross on a free kick, but Hart punches it away. Then it’s forward again for Citeh. So far, Citeh have an intensity that Liverpool lack. But that’s pretty regular for a Hodgson side, isn’t it? Patience.

18th minute: Where is the pressure on the Citeh midfield? Liverpool is letting the back line set up and find the right pass to the middle. That won’t do if they want to come back in this match.

20th minute: ZZZZZZZZZZZZ. And I agree that open seats in this match are inexcusable.

22nd minute: OK, after a rough first five minutes, Citeh are looking scary good. Milner and Johnson are great on the wings. Liverpool are playing too timidly.

24th minute: Is Torres going to get a decent touch in this first half? I suspect not. He looks off yet again.

25th minute: Every time Adam Johnson touches the ball Citeh look dangerous. This looks Arsenal-esque. I know they won’t always look this good, but day-um.

27th minute: @Ryan: Alan Parry is my least-favorite of the EPL announcers. He’s no Tyler, Darke or Crocker or Champion.

29th minute: I know I’m negatively biased against both teams, but does anyone else find this to be a boring exercise in waiting for the next Citeh goal? I’m asking honestly.

30th minute: Milner and Barry look great together. You’d think they’ve played together before.

31st minute: That was a classy exchange for Citeh. I counted 13 pqsses before they got it in and won a corner. Liverpool trying to go on the break but Barry breaks it up.

33rd minute: I’m trying to decide if this game is more painful for James T and Sven or commenter Keith. I suspect the latter.

34th minute: Liverpool with its first sustained push, as Gerrard sends a nice ball into the box but Torres can’t quite get it first. Liverpool retains the ball and builds up, but Ngog sends an easy shot to Joe Hart.

35th minute: @OM — Liverpool’s midfield isn’t just limp, it’s been non-existent. Lucas has had one touch so far. Gerrard was at fault for Barry being wide open on the goal. It’s rough for the Reds. And the Citeh fans have started chanting “USA!” to mock them. Heh.

37th minute: Second Lucas touch. Woot. Liverpool get credit for trying. They’re working the buildup, but when they lose it, Citeh are on offense in a flash, and Adam Johnson has another shot just wide of the post.

39th minute: Hey San Diegans, I like the Gaslamp District. I’m over 30, but I think I’m 24, not 21. Duh.

39th minute: For playing a 4-5-1, Citeh sure are prepared to sprint up. I know it’s more of a 4-3-2-1, but Yaya Toure has been moving up a lot.

40th minute: Nearly another as Tevez has a great turn, but it’s blocked wide for a corner. A great corner from Milner, but Citeh put both headers wide.

41st minute: Wait a second, did I just see an EA Sports ad on the IMG graphics for the EPL? Oooh, that’s big.

42nd minute: Scarf and long hair Mancini > short hair Mancini.

44th minute: It’s official with that lost ball — Glen Johnson and his bad hair are, indeed, pants.

45th minute: A little build-up for Liverpool, and Torres lays it off for Gerrard at the top of the box, but the skipper sends it well wide.

HALFTIME: 1-0 for Citeh. The rich owners have to be happy. Liverpool really aren’t in this match at all. I’m gonna have a diet coke and be back in a few minutes. See you then.

HALFTIME: Mustoe just said Gerrard has been excellent. I guess he has compared to the other Liverpool players, but no way was he excellent.

HERE WE GO!

46th minute: No changes for either side. Sorry, but my internet went down for a second. Weird.

48th minute: Liverpool seem to want it a little more in this half, but we’ll see how it plays out.

50th minute: Where is the Liverpool creativity. This isn’t the same team that played Arsenal, that’s for sure.

51st minute: Nearly the first quality move for Liverpool. Lucas makes a run but Ngog just misses him running into the box.

52nd minute: GOOOOOOOALLLL!!!! Citeh 2-0 Liverpool. Milner with the corner, and Micah Richards heads it toward Joe Hart, but before the ball gets to Hart, Tevez hits and turns. He wants the goal, but he might have just distracted Hart rather than touching it. Either way, Tevez was WIDE open in front of Hart.

55th minute: So it took a second Citeh goal to really wake up Liverpool?! Nice. But the Reds definitely are trying to come back now. This game could actually get entertaining.

57th minute: WOW!!!!!!!! Liverpool should have one. They beat Hart but hit the post, then Hart gets up and makes a great save on Jovanovich and another on Ngog. Amazing stuff.

58th minute: The goal goes to Tevez (and my fantasy team).

62nd minute: Things are getting chippy. I predict Dowd starts showing cards all over the place, and we get a penalty at some point.

62nd minute: The Toures are just so good in the middle of the park.. They stand Liverpool up at every turn. And Liverpool is playing better, too.

65th minute: And things suddenly slow down to a crawl. Bring on a sub or two, guys.

66th minute: @UKhanDoIt — Yes, I know it was Reina, not Hart. F**k me. I don’t edit my liveblogs, so sh*t happens.

67th minute: PENALTY!!! It had to be called, but Adam Johnson really went down easily there. Tevez puts it in easily and it’s 3-0 Citeh.

69th minute: Watching the first Tevez goal again (tee hee), he’s about 2 yards in front of Reina, and his body isn’t in front of him, just the leg. I don’t know that they could have waved it off.

71st minute: Can anyone say this isn’t a fair result so far? Citeh have looked leagues better for most of the match. As I said before, in stretches they look scary good.

73rd minute: Great turn there from Torres, but he cut the angle down on himself. His best touch of the match by far.

75th minute: Another free kick for Citeh. Adam Johnson is man of the match for me. He’s abused that side of the Liverpool defense. And I just realized it’s raining!

76th minute: It was a f**king goal. Let’s move on and talk about THIS game, please.

78th minute: Torres off for Ryan Babel. He’s just not right physically. Not at all.

79th minute: Citeh can definitely get another. Maybe two. And yes, that would be running it up, but the argument that you have to keep up with Chelsea is valid.

80th minute: Nice shot from Babel and another nice save from Hart.

80th minute: Tevez is such a bulldog. I love him and hate him at the same time.

82nd minute: This is starting to have the feel of an NFL preseason game.

83rd minute: And suddenly Alan Parry breaks into a rendition of ABC’s “How to be a Zillionaire.”
/80s music’d

85th minute: Zabaleta for Yaya Toure and Jo for Tevez.

87th minute: Dani Pacheco on for Jovanovich. I’m bored now, and I have to pee. Can I leave yet? Still 3 minutes for the meteor to come in and do its job.

88th minute: Blah blah pass, blah blah Liverpool loses it, blah blah Gerrard tries to spring Babel, blah blah nothing doing.

90th minute: Well, thanks for reading, everyone. I’ve enjoyed this liveblog more than I expected. We’ll see you for the next one at some point. Cheers.

FULL TIME: Parry said Chelsea had 6 points, not Citeh, LE. It ends 3-0 to Manchester Arabia. A good showing from them. Absolute class. Liverpool have some major questions to ask. See you next time!