All these are 'supposed' to be hurting…
No, that wasn’t a Chad Ochocinco quote. That’s my reaction to this and apparently what Nicky’s been up to in his injury time.
Yes! Nicklas Bendtner (22) is engaged to be married to his now-pregnant cougar girlfriend (35). Caroline Luel-Brockdorff (formerly Caroline Fleming of James Bond/Ian Flemming fame) recently finalized her divorce to Ian’s son and the Danish Duo, declared the “Danish Posh and Becks” have been inseparable ever since.
(You can see them below in happy/shirtless pose)
Essentially now, this “baby” is having a baby (and there’s plenty of evidence young parent’s aren’t always up for the challenge) but it seems to affect celebrities the spotlight a little differently. The famous young Baby-Mamma herself was only 23 when giving birth to her first child…and you can see how that turned out…(you only need to see the first 0:44 though).
But now, not only will he be a father, but because he’s engaged to an attractive, rich, older, socialite now – he has to act “sexy”. And Nicky just can’t pull that off. Props to him for finding a WAG that has no interest in his paltry £2.5m/yr salary when she has over £400m in the bank – but she also comes with baggage (namely two kids, ages 7 and 4).
So it begs the question, if he’s had an ongoing groin injury since last year (which is something men don’t want to hear about and women don’t want to think about), how exactly did this happen? Groin pulls “are painful to the touch, and pain increases with resistance movements, and stretching of the inner thigh and hamstrings.” Hmmmm, pain increases with resistance? When would you have resistance, and have to use your hamstrings…and be touched? Oooh oh! I know, Yoga? Yes, honey. Naked Bedtime Yoga.
So, the good news (if you don’t count the baby) is that Nicklas MUST be getting better! And since it looks like he’ll lose his starting position soon to another strapping, tall, hair-gelled Egret, Nicklas will have plenty of time to spend with his newborn.
Let’s hope it’s a girl so she can play dress-up in his pink boots.
Maybe Caroline just uses the Magic Spray before Naked Bedtime Yoga. BETCHA DIDN’T THINK OF THAT, DIDJA?
GROINS! Perhaps Nicky Pink Boots has a stock of horse placenta at the castle that helps him fulfill his household duties. Doesn’t that stuff work on groins too?
@Anon – “Magic Spray”? Do I want to know?
@OM – yeah, but in some Dane circles, a placenta that close to a ‘groin’ is still considered bestiality. He’s playing it safe for the Mrs’ sake.
@MW: Magic Spray! You know! The stuff that the physios always treat injuries with, after which the person who was just rolling around on the floor as though they needed a tourniquet pops up off the turf and runs around again.
Ooooooh THAT magic spray. Whew. Okay. I was worried that spray came from another place, which some consider ‘magic’. (p.s. eew).
For the second time in two days, I have occasion to say, in response: Ewwwwwwwwww.wwwwwwwwwww.wwwwwwwwwwwww.
I could actually use some of the Magic Spray Anon was referencing, not the stuff Wag was. Anybody know where you can get that?
1. I’m glad it wasn’t other magic though. That’s not fitting behaviour for a barroness.
2.I think I’ve said it more than twice in two days here, frankly. But you’re welcome to go look… /not to one up you or anything….
@OM – yeah, because if you don’t know where the stuff I was talking about comes from, we’re going to have to sit down and have a little talk…
@OM: No, but here you go.
Also, MW, you may have been unduly discounting this method.
@Anon – you are a strange and dirty dog.
@MW: Just for that, I will present to you two other images that appeared when I Goog-Images’d “turkey baster.” (1) Ha! (2) The wrestling move dubbed “the Turkey Baster.” <– That second one made me laugh out loud for realz.
And there’s the first Meet The Spartans reference in recorded history.
TJ
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Let’s all step aside from the “Barca is teh evul” meme on this site to revel in this moment of considered genius from Gerard Pique:
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Pique: “Me and Shakira? If all the rumours about my personal life would be true, Ibrahimovic would be very sad now.”
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/end TJ
I’m still giggling over the Turkey Baster wrestling move.
@Anon – those are some very angry Asians. And that guy seems very happy about his basting. You’d think he’d be envious that a different tool wasn’t used…/people are strange.
@keith – HA!
Keith – that’s excellent. But their still colossal douchebags.
their = they’re. stupid grammar.
@Keith – he should have said, “don’t believe me? fine! but her hips don’t lie…ask them!”
@ Wag: But sometimes, hips can lie, as, quoth Bell, Biv, Devoe: “Never trust a big butt and a smile.”
@OM – but, as we found out yesterday, everyone loves Beyonce!
Assuming the title is a reference to what I think it is…. Although only 2 episdoes in, ‘The League’ has been KILLING it this season.
Ive always wondered this re:Ribery’s extra curricular activities & his constant groin problems. I just assumed I didnt get it bc Im not a guy. In my head, it would be like having sex right after child labor. So, I must not get it.