Studs Up No More
Paternity labs around the world were saddened by the news that one of their most lucrative test objects has called it quits. Originaldo, Fat Ronaldo, or whatever you want to call him—perhaps one of the greatest footballers ever?—has undergone a vasectomy.
As Ronaldo put it, “I always dreamed of many children… Now I have children, the factory is closed.”
The recent acknowledgement of a 5-year-old boy named Alex as the heir to his Golden Boot legacy appears to have completed the Brazilian’s branches on the family tree.
The lad has had a busy life, between picking up trannies and scoring 62 goals for A Seleção, claiming 4 children from 3 different women. Apparently his swimmers also have a nose for the goal.
Alas, Originaldo has put paid to the idea of fathering his own starting XI after he retires from professional football. Unless, of course, there are more women out there to submit additional claims to his seminal conquests.
As he is closing up shop, the rush to claim Fat Ronaldo as several babies’ daddy might be on. With that likelihood, paternity labs should be well stocked with work for years to come.
What’s the point? You can’t get trannies pregnant anyway, can you?
@ berg: Well, there’s always the pregnant man scenario
OM – I’m just coming back to the site and thought 2-2 to Wigan would be the worst thing I saw today. But no. So thanks for that.