Unprofessional Foul


January 22, 2011

Your Freezing Cold Saturday Bootroom

Thank mercy none of these games are in 3-D

Great; my reward for waking up early is the chance to see the Reds screw up a trip to Molyneux. Can’t wait! Watching them under Kenny is a marginal improvement—the players seem to care more when they lose with Dalglish, for one—and there is a new-found purpose to their play, but I can’t help but think it’s all a cruel ruse and that the real Liverpool (2010/11 edition) shall be forever defined by its complete and utter mediocrity, a perfect storm of bad form, injuries, and abysmal play. Still, I love them dearly, like a family pet that’s missing a limb or a album by the Rolling Stones post-Exile on Main Street. I mean, they’re still inherently good, just not as close to that ideal image fixed in your mind.

So there’s a chance to watch Mick McCarthy flirt with the camera while you’re slurping down your Corn Flakes, and then at 10, we get two very different meals in Arsenal-Wigan and United-Brum. Both should result in comprehensive home wins, but both sides have shown a flair for the mundane despite being transcendent most of the year.

We have Franky Scar in the Bundesliga should either EPL game fail to titillate, and at lunchtime, we’ll feast on Villa like we imagine Mancini’s lot might. Darren Bent adds a new thrilling dimension to a turgid attack, but Citeh’s casually lethal attacking against Wolves must be close to sending Ged Houllier back to hospital. Or maybe in the last seven days, Stephen Warnock’s morphed from crap full-back into a left-footed version of Dani Alves. I’m not holding my breath.

If you’re still not satiated, you can always join the mid-afternoon’s Aesthetic Fawn Parade for the tiki-taki Blaugrana, or there’s Banega, Aduriz, and Mata up against Malaga.

And tonight, when you’re blackout drunk, you can challenge yourselves to find Telefutura on the TV so you can see some weird youth-y USMNT knock it around against La Roja of Chile.

And then, you can sleep until the NFL playoffs tomorrow afternoon, because it’s either that or it’s Blackburn/West Brom (sorry, jjf3). We might liveblog later, but I’ve no clue just yet.

Your TV Menu in Full:
7:45am Wolves vs Liverpool, ESPN2, England Premier
9:30am Borussia Dortmund vs Stuttgart, GolTV, Germany
9:30am Bayern Munich vs Kaiserslautern, ESPND, Germany
10:00am Arsenal vs Wigan, Soccer Plus, England Premier
10:00am Manchester U vs Birmingham, FSC, England Premier
12:00pm Sevilla vs Levante, ESPN3.com, Spain La Liga
12:00pm Palermo vs Brescia, ESPN3.com, Italy Serie A
12:30pm Aston Villa vs Manchester City, FSC, England Premier
2:00pm Barcelona vs Racing Santander, GolTV, Spain La Liga
2:45pm AS Roma vs Cagliari, FSC, Italy Serie A
3:00pm Argentina vs Venezuela, ESPN3.com, S.American U20
4:00pm Valencia vs Málaga, GolTV, Spain La Liga
5:10pm Chile vs Uruguay, ESPN3.com, S. American U20 Cup
6:00pm Cruz Azul vs UNAM Pumas, Fox Deportes, Mexico
6:00pm Querétaro vs Morelia, Telefutura, Mexico
6:00pm Monterrey vs Atlante, Telemundo, Mexico
8:00pm Santos Laguna vs Pachuca, Galavision, Mexico
8:00pm Guadalajara vs San Luis, Telemundo, Mexico
10:00pm USA vs Chile, ESPN3.com, Telefutura, Friendly

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James T