Unprofessional Foul

Featured Fouls

Neil Ashton's a nice guy, decent reporter. But this is just stupid. Precious Roy

Of Course He FJM’d Something

So this was super low-hanging fruit. So much so that I really considered not doing it. Instead I was going to FJM the comments on the same piece, because that’s even lower-hanging fruit. But this piece from October sent the Soccerlytics world into a shit fit, which is about the easiest thing in the world […]

Dirk-Kuyt-001 All

We wrote a lot of words, some of them alright

Unprofessional Foul has been a beautiful thing in my life for a long time. I have a lot of friends as a result of our communal comment-sectioning in David Hirshey’s columns on Deadspin — and then the ‘stache ended up being one of the groomsmen in my wedding some years later. UFers have an almost […]

No longer besties. All

L’Affaire Valbuena

Although the story broke a while ago, everyone is still talking about “L’Affaire Valbuena.” Need to catch up? Confused from the start? Simply here for the titillation? Let’s run through things so we’re all on the same page. Back in June 2015 as Les Bleus were preparing for friendlies against Belgium and Albania, rumors began […]

Manchester United fans All

Divorce, Anger, Sadness: The Manchester United Story

  None of us would be here if not for the journey, and none of us knows where the journey will lead us from here. As I look back at the time since Unprofessional Foul shut its doors, I see a roller coaster of emotions, changes left and right, new love and massive sadness. The […]

UF at The Centennial.  Be there. All

The Good, The Bad, The WTF

Let’s not kid ourselves. We don’t really get to do these anymore. As such, I am dispensing with any notion that we might present a “good” or “bad” here and going straight to the WTF. That is what you want, right? Actually, I don’t care. Here we go. Welcome to Unprofessional Foul’s new venture, the […]


The headline reads "Simeone is all heart".

Letter to Simeone

In the wake of José Mourinho’s sacking, the rumor mill is churning out claims that Diego “El Cholo” Simeone is the front-runner to take over at Chelsea in the summer. Hold on just a second; I have my own plan...
by BG


It Has Risen

[Tap, tap, tap] Hello? Is this thing on? Can you hear me? Can you hear me now? Welcome everyone to the UnprofessionalFoul.com Resurrection Party… otherwise known as UF’s eighth birthday extravaganza. It has also bee...
by The Fan's Attic



Holy cow, it’s here. This is it. Today. It’s for all the marbles. And who doesn’t want all of the marbles? Nobody. Or at least nobody who isn’t Argentinian or German. It’s Messi’s date with d...
by Precious Roy


Robben: AAAAAAAHH!!!!

Messi: OOOOOOHH!!!!

Semifinal BOOTROOM: The Day of The Day After

You wanted more goals in the knockout rounds. Are you not entertained!? Wow that was an outburst by Germany yesterday. Today the Netherlands and Argentina hope to put on a show of their own but only one can march forward to fac...
by Orr

Disclaimer: Not affiliated with GM in any way.

Semifinal BOOTROOM: Day One – Back to 2002

Would be way better if it was day TWO, back to 2002. Anyways, our first semifinal features the two countries that met in the final back in that glorious year when Nelly and Celine Dion topped the charts. It’s Germany v. B...
by Orr

costa rica fans

QUARTERFINALS DAY 2: Brokeback Hangover

Welp, Neymar and James Rodriguez are now both out of the World Cup significantly dimming the superstar wattage.  Fortunately, Lionel Messi is still gadflying about today against the Waffle-Bastards Belgium in the early match....
by The Fan's Attic